Have you noticed that when you look at your “To Do” list you sometimes feel suddenly de-energized, maybe even resentful? Even if some of the things on the list are things you normally really enjoy doing, do they suddenly seem like an imposition?
Well, as a friend of mine used to say, that’s because you’ve been “shoulding” on yourself!
It’s fascinating: the moment we make something that we want to do something we “should” do, our small self (often called our “ego”) begins to complain about “having to” do it. It doesn’t matter how much we wanted to do it before; all that matters now is that it’s on that list and so has become a “should.” The body now responds to it as a stressor rather than a pleasure: our belly tightens, there’s tension in our arms and shoulders, and for some, a small rush of adrenaline “fight or flight” whenever we think about doing it.
This physical response, without an actual opportunity for “fight or flight,” builds up toxins in the system that cause other symptoms in the body, ranging from arthritis to diabetes, and can, for some of us, lead to adrenaline depletion.
Now, the word should is by no means the only such word that works that way—it’s just the one currently in style. Other equally devastating words are: ought (as in, “I ought to be…”), must (as in, “you must do this or…”), have-to (as in, “but I have to!”), and got-to (as in, “I gotta get this done before….”). Each and every one of these is as toxic to the human body as Continue reading What are the 5 Toxic Words?